On many occasions, those who are addicted can become aggressive if they do not get what they want, or can compulsively lie to achieve their purposes. Therefore, it is essential to have patience and know how to deal with someone who has some kind of addiction.
In the same way that there are different addictions, there are also different ways of being. Thus, the communication will vary depending on each person and the type of addiction. However, this problem becomes even greater when the addict is your partner since sadness, anger, and chaos will be constant. What can we do in these cases? Also, visit alcohol medical detox for further information.
He is sick and needs help
If you are in this case, the first thing you should do is not to judge your partner harshly. Although it is difficult for you, remember that addiction is a disease and when we judge the addict, this one sinks deeper into that problem. It is not that we are weak or cowardly and that's why we accept it, but we seek to give it the stability that allows it to combat its loneliness and addiction.
Speak when the person is able to do it
A very common mistake is trying to talk to an addicted person when they are intoxicated. Unfortunately, during this stage your partner cannot understand what you say, you will be prey to your feelings and the next day he will have forgotten the discussion. Cases of violence usually occur just at this time because of the loss of control of the two people. Ideally, you should wait until your partner is conscious to speak, and also try to have someone nearby to control it if it becomes violent.
Keep a simple conversation
When you are calm you can start the conversation with something similar to "I need to talk, please listen to me without interrupting". Do not worry if it sounds like an order, in reality, this phrase will help you attract your attention. Then explain the situation in a simple way: "Last night you were late, drunk, you woke up the children and you scared them". From this moment you can express your feelings: fears for your children, for you as a couple, etc.
It is advisable to express myself calmly, without alterations or raise your voice. The addicted person can respond unpredictably to hostile environments so it will be important to speak to him/her from the sincerity, directly but tactfully.
Tell the truth
Do not lie or say things that you will not accomplish like you will leave the house. It is better to talk about the concern that your children and you have for him or her and their health. If you have made the decision to break with this relationship, you must explain when you will do it and if there is any possibility of reconciliation later on.
Lying with threats that will never be fulfilled is just another way to extend the situation. Your partner will be aware that it is a manipulation technique that you never carry out, so before speaking it is convenient to know that what we will say will be true.
Do not fall in the game of promises
It is very common for addicts to promise what their partner wants to hear. However, you must stand firm and not allow your promises to surround you. Believing and giving new opportunities will make you addicted to a couple who at the moment cannot give you a quality relationship.
Talking to an addict: complicated task
It will never be easy to talk to your partner if he is an addict. You will be scared, hurt and disappointed by the whole situation, but when you start a conversation you will help them take the first step. Remember that you can help him get ahead, but you can never decide for him. Inviting him to ask for professional help can be a great idea.