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Negotiate to Win: How to Gain and Keep the Upper Hand

Kevin Gardner2349 17-Sep-2018

Negotiate to Win: How to Gain and Keep the Upper Hand

Are you in need of some adept negotiation skills? Learning to negotiate can make all of the difference when seeking a position, buying a home or car, or even closing your next business deal. Fortunately, there are a few ways that you can improve your ability to negotiate well, and even gain the advantage. Consider these recommendations from experts and even FBI agents in securing the upper hand.


Take Control of Your Emotions

One of the worst things a person can do in a negotiation is to allow their emotions to take over. When you are attempting to forge a deal, you must have a firm hold on your emotions and your ability to influence others in the midst of a negotiation. People who attend a negotiation with their feelings in disarray can find themselves willing to settle for something that they normally wouldn't, and regret it later. When you are calm and your mind is clear, you are in a prime position to evaluate any terms or suggestions that come in your direction.


Solid negotiation training suggests that emotions can be a friend or an adversary. Time Magazine suggests that you can use your emotional intelligence to deliver tactical empathy and create an illusion of control for the other side. By taking rein of your emotions, you can influence the feelings and decision-making processes of others during the negotiation. 


Make It Sound Sweet

There are some individuals who can take a lopsided deal if it is in their favor, but most clients and their lawyers run for the hills or terminate the negotiation if the terms appear unfair. Learning to offer a satisfying deal for the other side as well is one of the ways that you can win over clients in a negotiation that benefits you more in the end.


The Harvard Business School of Working Knowledge suggests that it is wise to make an aggressive argument first if possible so that the terms that follow revolve more around your proposed numbers and suggestions. Keep in mind that few people will agree to terms that are not truly beneficial for them in some way, so be sure to strike a greater balance if you want the agreement to go through.


Create a List of Bottom Line Terms

If you go into the meeting with no clear terms or must-haves, you place yourself in an undesirable position during the negotiation process. Without a set of terms to keep in mind, you may leave valuable advantages off the table that should be considered for your own benefit. In addition, without a set of unique terms, you leave the other party to come up with suggestions for you to accept. 


Get Some Rest Before the Meeting

Inc Magazine makes the recommendation to always get a great night’s sleep before any negotiation on the following day. Willpower tends to fade as the day progresses, making you more susceptible to signing a poor agreement in the fog. If you want to be extra-sharp during the meeting, do not arrive exhausted and out of focus.


Consider Body Language and Verbal Signals

You can tell a lot about where the negotiation is going by paying close attention to the body language and speech of others. When the other individual grows tired of negotiating, he or she is more likely to send signals that they want to end the negotiation quickly. Forbes suggests that the use of “maybe” and “not right now” in the meeting can be clear flags that the party does not require more important concessions and is ready to close the deal. 


Understanding that negotiations are a natural part of life is important to boost your abilities and confidence at the table. The old saying of “Never let them see you sweat” rings true in the heart of any negotiation. Consider bringing someone with you to the meeting to help you make a more strategic decision. Many negotiations can take days, weeks or even months to settle. Learning to be patient during long, high-risk negotiations is quite difficult, but it is a trait that can help you win more deals. If you can convince the other party that time is running out, you can influence them to accept the deal.



Updated 07-Sep-2019

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